If I Perish, I Perish
In my experience, there are phases of dealing with life after cancer or life with chronic cancer. The first phase is shock and horror. A big red C is constantly hanging in front of your face. This is the adjustment phase.
The next phase involves finding and pursuing your chosen path in reaction to the cancer–medical, nutritional, spiritual, any combination of these or remaining status quo. This is the proactive phase.
Finally comes the acceptance phase. Ultimately control is not in my hands. God numbers my days. I am sure that my choices affect what happens to me, however even with all of my efforts I cannot be in the driver’s seat. I have finally come to the place where I can relax and say as Esther did in the Bible, ”If I perish, I perish.” I am rejoining life instead of clinging to it. It feels good.
